[And she's trying to live up to the image of that rank, to live up to being a leader and that means being steady and stable and not just barely holding tears back. It had been a problem throughout the Blight, this need she felt to let people see her afraid or upset as little as possible. Apparently, things don't really change so readily.
She watches him sit down, keep his gaze off the camera.
And then he names his possessor. If anything dries her tears, it's numb shock.]
Justice... He didn't make it back across the Veil.
[She hadn't noticed. She, a spirit healer, reaching out to the Fade to heal the wounded from the battle at Vigil's Keep, hadn't noticed the free spirit trapped on the wrong side of the Veil.
The problem with having shouldered so many problems for so many people is it's become too easy to blame herself for every problem. If she and Anders had been friends in the Circle instead of barely knowing each other, would things have been better? If she had noticed Justice, would things have been better?]
...That sounds familiar, that idea. Voluntary possession. [It comes to her, she remembers the voices behind her as they traveled the road between Vigil's Keep and Amaranthine, and remembering it solely for how interesting an idea it had seemed at the time. So much for that.] Nathaniel, he suggested it to Justice. I'm not surprised he took it up with you.
[She swallows the lump rising in her throat again. What now? It's not as simple as just finding a way to drive out a demon with timelier preparation anymore. This isn't anything like Amalia's case. Both host and possessor are her friends, and it was never a matter of regaining control because the intent to take it away had never been there.]
I don't know what to say. Except- I don't think it's your fault, either. Whatever happened to you that day, I don't believe for a single moment either of you wanted it.
no subject
She watches him sit down, keep his gaze off the camera.
And then he names his possessor. If anything dries her tears, it's numb shock.]
Justice... He didn't make it back across the Veil.
[She hadn't noticed. She, a spirit healer, reaching out to the Fade to heal the wounded from the battle at Vigil's Keep, hadn't noticed the free spirit trapped on the wrong side of the Veil.
The problem with having shouldered so many problems for so many people is it's become too easy to blame herself for every problem. If she and Anders had been friends in the Circle instead of barely knowing each other, would things have been better? If she had noticed Justice, would things have been better?]
...That sounds familiar, that idea. Voluntary possession. [It comes to her, she remembers the voices behind her as they traveled the road between Vigil's Keep and Amaranthine, and remembering it solely for how interesting an idea it had seemed at the time. So much for that.] Nathaniel, he suggested it to Justice. I'm not surprised he took it up with you.
[She swallows the lump rising in her throat again. What now? It's not as simple as just finding a way to drive out a demon with timelier preparation anymore. This isn't anything like Amalia's case. Both host and possessor are her friends, and it was never a matter of regaining control because the intent to take it away had never been there.]
I don't know what to say. Except- I don't think it's your fault, either. Whatever happened to you that day, I don't believe for a single moment either of you wanted it.