mandatum: <user name="fuyu_icons" site="livejournal.com"> (🌹 in the summer)
audrey horne. ([personal profile] mandatum) wrote in [community profile] calling_net2016-08-30 11:21 pm
Entry tags:

one 🌹 audio | un: audacious

--ll I'm saying is, this place is the pits.

[This more or less out of nowhere. A very loud statement bursting through the devices along with a cacophonous burst of Bar Soundsâ„¢. Someone is audibly quaffing. Some other people are banging what are presumably pints, or possibly horns, of ale on the table in rhythm. There is a folk song somewhere in the background about a maid who came a-wandering.]

[Audrey sounds disgusted.]


You can't just drip beer down your beard and never wash it. No, I can tell you never wash your beard, buddy. I can tell it, I can smell it, I can see last week's lunch in it. Don't play games with me. You didn't even skin that lion right. I know all about skinning. I live at a lodge. No, don't--don't start picking bacon out of it! Go home and shower. Go. Get out. And leave me your beer.

[There's relative silence for a moment (the folk song continuing on in the background, because nothing stops a folk song), then a grumble and retreating footsteps. A loud, put-upon sigh.]

There's blood on this floor. Cripes. I thought home was bad--wait, did I turn this--

[. . . which appears to be all.]
roberteo: (what the fuck)

[personal profile] roberteo 2016-09-06 10:43 pm (UTC)(link)
My goodness! Perhaps you should leave, then!