CALL.net • text • un: themeddler

[roberteo]

HELLO! MY NAME IS ROBERT E. O. SPEEDWAGON AND I AM POLitely requesting some assistance, there we go.

In any case, I request that someone tell me the best location here in which to procure a drink of the alcoholic variety! Out of simple curiosity, of course. I'm still getting the hang of this blasted...device! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.

Fascinating!

Sincerely,

Robert Edward O. Speedwagon

[...Someone please tell him to stop.]

Comments

un: pythias

[malignans]

[That name...]

[It seems utterly impossible that it's really him, but who else could it be? He's obviously a bumbling idiot. Besides, as much as Dio is loath to admit it, he knows first hand that death means little to this place. He decides to approach this with a relative amount of caution, neither using the user name that has come to be associated with him, nor revealing his face. He won't have what he's beginning to build her destroyed by this fool running his mouth.]

That would depend entirely on which city you're currently in.

[roberteo]

I am in

[There's...a long pause, of about a minute.]

the City of Shadows!

[malignans]

[During that long pause, Dio would probably feel a migraine coming on. You know, if he got migraines anymore sans swift kicks literally into his head. He exudes the opposite of the patience of a saint privately.]

The Velvet is a fairly well-known nightclub, but I haven't spent as much time there to know of any quieter places for a drink. I don't much frequent them myself.

[roberteo]

Spectacular! I'll have to pay this "nightclub" a visit.

May I ask your name to remember your good favor?

[malignans]

Dennis Brant. It is a pleasure, Mr Speedwagon.

[He's dangling his true name right in front of Speedwagon, which could prove to be quite the dangerous thing to do if he's able to see through the subtle anglicizing of his name. But Dio doubts Speedwagon's ability to think that deeply on the matter and draw such a conclusion, so it shall be his own private little joke.]

[roberteo]

[While such doubts are very rude, they're...well, they're not entirely unfounded, as he seems to have no suspicions about Dio's identity.]

You as well, Mr. Brant!!!

[malignans]

[Maybe be less predictable, Speedwagon, and Dio will be less rude in his assumptions.]

Please don't hesitate to contact me privately should you have any further questions.

[Except do. Hesitate so much that you don't.]

[roberteo]

Perhaps we can share a drink sometime!

[malignans]

[T c h.]

Who can say what the future holds?

[roberteo]

I can! The future holds me getting a drink with you, kind stranger!

un: ASolomons

[devoutish]

Would this drink be a new experience for you?

[That's adorable.]

[roberteo]

Can you clarify?

[devoutish]

Have you ever had alcohol before? You're talking like it's new to you.

[roberteo]

I've been drinking since I was a boy.

[devoutish]

Have you. My mistake.

Ask a native. They've got a help desk over at McAran Tower.

[roberteo]

I thought I would ask around first before I attempted that, but I thank you for the assistance!

[devoutish]

Yeah.

What are you, a whiskey man?

[roberteo]

Yes, though I'm no stranger to ale.

[devoutish]

Rum?

un: attar

[digiorno]

. . . You're looking for a bar?

[What a precious nerd, is the immediate impression.]

There are seven cities, so depending on which one you're in I can direct you towards one. It's nice to meet you, Mr. Speedwagon.

[roberteo]

City of Shadows, if I'm remembering correctly!

Pleased to meet you too, if you'll give me a name.

[digiorno]

Ah, Shadows is not always a very nice place. But if you're looking for bars there, I'll send you a few to choose from.

[And, after a few moments, he does; there are several, with notations ranging from "seedy" to "decent" to "very nice", with one marked as "overpriced" and a frowny face.]

My name is Giorno Giovanna. It's not so unique a name as yours, I'm afraid.

[roberteo]

It's plenty unique, I think! French-sounding, at least.

[digiorno]

Italian, actually. About as Italian as it gets, although Giovanni is a more common last name.

[. . . hm . . .]

It's funny, I only sometimes go by it these days. A lot of times my friends just call me Giogio.

[roberteo]

Oh! Is this one of those names you have to pronounce strangely? I have a friend named Jojo, is it said like that?

[digiorno]

It's said exactly like that, actually.

It's funny, too, because I know the name Speedwagon. Not a person, but an organization — a foundation. You've never heard of them, have you?

[roberteo]

No, I have not. Perhaps it's a relative?

[This is a joke, one that Giorno doesn't have the context to: it's rather amusing to him that any Speedwagon would ever rise to something as noble as some kind of foundation. This includes himself.]

[digiorno]

Possibly. It's strange, though. I was so sure that the initials were R-E-O, and then Speedwagon. I might be confused. Funny coincidences all around.

[roberteo]

It is a fun coincidence, I must admit! Perhaps I can capitalize off of the success of this other Speedwagon.

[digiorno]

Perhaps. Names are the strangest coincidence of all, sometimes.

Your Jojo. What is he like? I wonder if there are more coincidences there.

[roberteo]

Well, my Jojo is exceedingly tall and strong, and very bravehearted! He likes dogs, I've been told, and chocolate. He just got married!